Change

Change

If you’ve ever watched the Big Bang Theory, you know that Sheldon, one of the main characters, hates change. In fact, he goes to extreme lengths to stop and/or undo any changes to his routine and to the people in his life. Over the course of the show’s many seasons, though, it becomes evident that even a genius cannot stop change.

Some people embrace change. Some resist it vehemently. Others just roll with it. Most of us are a mix of all these approaches.

As Christians, though, we have tools for coping with change that the rest of the world does not have.

Coping with Change

I find comfort in knowing that change is also Biblical, that it’s God’s idea.

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1)

“He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!’ Then he said, ‘Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.’ (Rev. 21:5)

In addition, focusing on the fact that healthy change leads to dependence on God helps direct my mindset during change of any size and amount. This doesn’t come naturally or easily, though. It takes deliberate intent.

Elements of Healthy Change

Though there are many more, elements of healthy change consist of focusing on the following elements:

1. Contentment

“Godliness with contentment is great gain.” (1 Timothy 6:6)

Contentment doesn’t come naturally for most people. Instead, it’s something we learn. Even one of the greatest missionaries ever admits to having to develop contentment.

 “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:11-13)

The key to contentment, as evidenced by Paul’s testimony, is that it rests upon God, not upon our circumstances.

2. God’s Sovereignty

As believers, we can find peace in knowing that God is working for our good regardless of ourcircumstances.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 29For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.” (Romans 8:28-29)

God knows the beginning from the end, and we can full trust him at all times for this reason.

3. Trust

One of my mottos is “Do what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it.” As hard as I try to live up to this, I sometimes fail. God, on the other hand, never fails to do what he says he’ll do. He is infinitely trustworthy. We can completely place our trust in him to care for us even with tumultuous change taking place.

 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

4. The Future Kingdom

Placing my present circumstances, even when they feel like chaos, against eternity brings a sense of peace and stability within the emotional roller coast of change.

“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:14)

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:18)

Our goal is upward. For this reason, we press on even when we feel like giving up.

Change is Inevitable

Change is sometimes good, sometimes bad. It’s often stressful, which is also both good and bad. We do need stress to grow, after all. Change is also often unexpected, but it’s also sometimes planned and expected with life usually consisting of a mix of both.

For sure, though, change is inevitable. Our aging bodies are evidence of this truth. So, as we continue to experience change physically, mentally, and spiritually, let us be sure to focus on the tools God gives us.

“Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.” (Psalm 37:4-6)

A Simple Approach to Bible Study

Take a few minutes to read through Philippians 4 with the purpose of answering one, simple question:

How does it apply to me?

Don’t worry about getting deeply spiritual or even too specific. Just use the words given to list points of application.

Assuming you’ve made your list, compare it to the one I’ve made. Think of this like what you might discuss as you sit with a group of friends discussing God’s word.

  1. Stop worrying.
  2. Be full of joy in the Lord.
  3. Pray about everything.
  4. Fix your thoughts.
  5. Put God’s truth into action.
  6. Follow Godly examples.
  7. Let God’s peace reign.
  8. Learn to be happy regardless of circumstances.
  9. Christ gives the strength you need, sometimes through others.
  10. God meets every need.

This simple activity is a great way to begin discussing Scripture with friends. Add in asking “What does it say?” (looking at context) and “What does it mean?” (bringing in other Scripture), and it won’t take long before the Bible comes alive like never before for you.

Mighty Waves

The Bible often uses nature to illustrate God’s power and glory. By no means do we fully grasp the extent of that power, but certain verses do help us have some sense of the vastness and strength of His power.

“In his hand are the depths of the earth; the heights of the mountains are his also. The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land.” (Psalm 95:4-5)

“The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork. Day to day pours out speech, and night to night reveals knowledge.” (Psalm 19:1-2)

For me, waves speaks profoundly about the vastness and awesomeness of God’s power.

“You rule the raging of the sea; when its waves rise, you still them.” (Psalm 89:9)

“Or who shut in the sea with doors when it burst out from the womb, when I made clouds its garment and thick darkness its swaddling band, and prescribed limits for it and set bars and doors, and said, ‘Thus far shall you come, and no farther, and here shall your proud waves be stayed’?” (Job 38:8-11)

So, when I read that “Ocean Waves are Officially Getting Stronger,” and how this is associated with the strength of the wind and rising water temperatures, I actually find comfort even though this means the waves are also becoming more destructive.

The comfort comes because I am reminded of just how powerful God is. It brings me back to a place of awe and wonder over his might. And I once again find myself at a loss for words to describe Him.

“One day he got into a boat with his disciples, and he said to them, ‘Let us go across to the other side of the lake.’ So they set out, and as they sailed he fell asleep. And a windstorm came down on the lake, and they were filling with water and were in danger. And they went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we are perishing!’ And he awoke and rebuked the wind and the raging waves, and they ceased, and there was a calm. He said to them, ‘Where is your faith?’ And they were afraid, and they marveled, saying to one another, ‘Who then is this, that he commands even winds and water, and they obey him?’ (Luke 8:22-25)

The Fellowship of the Church

What is Fellowship?

All too often, it seems like “fellowship” means the same in practice as “visiting.” “Fellowship” is simply used as justification to visit without making commitment to the relationship.

But are they really the same? Or, is “fellowship” something more than merely “visiting”?

One of the best ways I can think of to understand fellowship comes from my favorite movie and book series, Lord of the Rings. More specifically, the first in the series: The Fellowship of the Ring.

Beyond Visiting

This first book/movie in the series involves individuals bound to one another because they were working toward the same goal. Because of that journey, though, they developed deep bonds of friendship.

This exemplifies what fellowship is really meant to be. Beyond visiting, fellowship is a process of developing deep and lasting relationships.

A Threefold Cord

The Bible offers a description that while not using the word “fellowship” certainly describes this idea of deeply-developed companionship and the role it can play in a person’s life.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)

Fellowship gets at eradicating loneliness. It solidifies encouragement. And, it provides stability and strength for persevering when life become difficult.

Going Beyond Visiting

This better understanding of fellowship motivates me to move beyond only visiting with my fellow Christians, especially the ones with which I interact regularly. Fellowship leads me to efforts toward developing depth and moving well beyond, “Hi. How are you?”

I’m looking forward to developing depth in relationships and moving beyond just visiting. I’m looking forward to more fellowship. Won’t you join me?

Cultivating Perseverance

Recently, I’ve felt worn out both physically and mentally. I’ve also felt like I’m spinning my wheels spiritually. I believe in progress over perfection, but I’m struggling with keeping my energy and motivation up. In other words, I’m struggling with persevering.

Maybe that’s why the theme of cultivating perseverance stuck out to me during a recent read of Hebrews 12. Specifically, cultivating perseverance by once again resetting my focus.

Focus Determines Reality

Several verses brought my attention to thinking about my focus. Turns out, my thoughts were scattered and focused on the temporary. These verses together helped reset my focus.

Verses 1 & 2 – “Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us; fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”

Verses 11, 12 & 13 – “All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble, and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.”

I can’t help but picture a race like the one in the photo when I read these verses. When I get this visual, I am reminded of three important things that make for a successful race. These things apply to perseverance in any area of life, and I made this application to what I had been going through recently.

  1. Distractions are weighing me down.
  2. My goal is Jesus. Nothing else.
  3. Discipline brings strength.

Hebrews 12 ends by focusing us again on the “Why?” for continued perseverance.

Verses 28 & 29 – “Therefore, since we receive a kingdom which cannot be shaken, let us show gratitude, by which we may offer to God an acceptable service with reverence and awe; for our God is a consuming fire.”

Through Jesus, we receive something that cannot fall apart. By letting go of distractions, focusing on Jesus, and learning from mistakes and failure, we cultivate perseverance that takes us to what we cannot lose. Let that truth encourage you today.

Onward & Forward

“The righteous will move onward and forward, and those with pure hearts will become stronger and stronger.” (Job 17:9)

Job’s friends were pretty tough on him. They were wrong in their accusations too. Yet, Job kept focusing on God. Job knew that God’s ways were the only sure steps he could take.

So, Job moved “onward and forward” and became “stronger and stronger,” knowing God was faithful. Even amidst devastation, Job sought God.

Sometimes, one step onward and forward is all we can take. We can trust that God will strengthen us as we keep our focus on Him.

“The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.” (Psalm 34:10)

Living Intentionally

Most of us want to live a well thought out life. We want to be deliberate about our choices and how we respond to life. Unfortunately, life gets so busy and overwhelming sometimes that we end up living far from intentionally.

No matter how busy we get, we can choose to incorporate certain activities that help us live more intentionally than not. Let me say it another way. If your life seems reactionary and out of control rather than intentional, there are some habits that can help flip that.

Intentional Habits

While the specific actions may look different from on person to the next, living intentionally does have some foundational aspects that every Christian can incorporate.

  1. Rest. Take time to be still at least every morning and evening.
  2. Listen. Pay attention to the people in your life, the face-to-face not electronic life.
  3. Experience God’s presence. Get outside and go for a walk or just sit and listen to nature. Let Him fill your thoughts.
  4. Partner with Jesus. Our effort alone won’t get us there; don’t be too proud to ask for help.

If you’re busy and overwhelmed right now, your first response/reaction is probably something like, “How? I just don’t have the time.” For now, let me offer the following Scripture by way of encouragement for making the time, for making these activities non-negotiable.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

“The Lord replied, ‘My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.’” (Exodus 33:14)

“Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, [Jesus] said to them, ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.’” (Mark 6:31)

“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” (Psalm 37:7a)

“This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: ‘In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.’” (Isaiah 30:15)

“He says, ‘Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted on the earth.’” (Psalm 46:10)

Busyness and overload continually draws us into reactionary mode. Learning to respond instead of react is important, but we can only do that if we deliberately decide to incorporate these habits no matter how busy we are. It’s sort of like telling the chaos it’s not in control of your life even if you feel like it is.

Ready to move back into intentionality?

Start with these Biblical principles. Be stubborn about consistently incorporating them, and you’ll find God’s peace, power and presence dominating your life more than busyness and overload.

Want more? The following posts can help you develop a more intentional life.

 

Applying Personality Profiles

Personality Profiles

Over the past 20 years or so, I’ve taken at least three different types of personality profile assessments. They all provide the same, basic information, just different wording.

Though personality can change slightly as we mature, our base personality never really changes. The personality we’re born with, research shows, is the personality we live with our whole lives.

Some people disagree with the effectiveness and even accuracy of personality profiling. My experience, however, shows them to not only be generally accurate most of the time but helpful as well.

Speaking toward accuracy, I’m the poster child for my personality profile — known as INFJ or The Advocate — on what’s probably the most well-known profiling system, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. (Note: I took my most recent profile on 16 Personalities.)

As for helpfulness, that’s been more of a journey. Or perhaps, more accurately, a maturing toward realizing that the helpfulness really is determined by focus. For many years, I had a wrong focus when it came to my personality profile.

Value of Personality Profiles

Personality profiles helped me learn more about others and about myself by identifying both strengths and weaknesses. In addition, personality profiling helped me better appreciate the differences from one individual to the next.

Personality profiling also gave me an idea of how a person processes information and why they react the way they do to different situations. It also helps in understanding why people avoid certain situations and why they prefer to be alone or with others.

When I realized these differences between people simply because of personality, I began to see that often it’s not that one person has to be wrong and the other right. Instead, they are often just coming at situations from different perspectives and with different ways of processing information.

An Example

Take my husband and me for example. To relax, I like to read and maybe watch a movie. I need a lot of quiet and alone time in order to regain the energy necessary to be around people. He, on the other hand, uses activities like yard work and running with a group to relax. He enjoys being around people a lot with the number of people not mattering much. If I’m around people, I prefer a small group of close friends, and even then not too often.

A main difference in our personalities is that he is an extravert, and I am an introvert. That element combined with others specific to our personalities help explain why we have these and other preferences.

Over the years, this information helped us both understand each other better and to accept that we process information differently. We also see how we have very different social and recharging needs. This information encourages us to better accommodate one another instead of trying to change one another or insist on what suits us best.

Personality Profiling Mistakes

The mistake I too often make with personality profiling is putting the focus on myself. My natural reaction whenever I’ve taken a profile is to first want other people to learn about and then appreciate my unique personality. I expect them to want to apply it like I do and am disappointed when those closest to me fail to better understand and appreciate me and to show this understanding and appreciation in tangible ways.

In other words, knowing personality profiles, mine and others, was not only less effective but also damaging to myself and my relationships when I made it all about me. Fortunately, I’ve always come around and realized the error of my ways. I then refocus on using personality profiles to improve my relationships.

Personalities in Ministry

Three Scriptures specifically helped transformed my application of personality profiling. The Holy Spirit connected the use of personality profiling with God’s heart on interacting with others. He helped me understand how he made me and why. This understanding transformed me and my relationships.

Doing Your Part

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” (Romans 12:8)

Learning personality styles of the people with whom I interact helps me better live at peace with others. Instead of getting frustrated at what people say and do and how they say and do it, I can instead better understand where they are coming from as it relates to their personality. Everybody processes information differently, and there are a lot of right ways to get results.

Sure, people make choices that disturb peaceful relationships, and not all of those choices can be accounted for by personality. Yet, knowing others basic personality style helps ease frustration because I am at least aware of differences in personality at play. For me, this helps increase the peace in my interpersonal interactions.

Accepting Weaknesses

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Every person has weaknesses. For me, the ones listed in my personality profile describe mine well. If I think about them too much, I focus on wishing I had a different personality. I’ve even asked God to give me a different personality, to take away those specific weaknesses. Of course he didn’t since he made me the way I am for a reason.

Eventually, I realized God really does show his power through my weaknesses. I’m not quite to the point of boasting about them a lot, but I do more regularly acknowledge them and also ask God to work through them. When he does, I try to notice and to give him the credit.

With that, I am learning to appreciate my weaknesses. Doing so puts the focus more on God and his power working in my life. In these same ways, I see him working in the lives of others too.

Essential Parts

“Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.” (1 Corinthians 12:27)

Every Christian is a unique part of the body of Christ. We need all of the parts to have an effective and healthy body. Having a variety of personalities is a part of this truth.

Every personality brings value to the whole. Every one can make it healthier.

Nichole Palmitier, an Associate Pastor at New Hope Assembly of God in Three Rivers, MI (my home church) sums up well this idea of appreciating personalities as a part of ministry.

“I like to think about interacting with different personalities or even the same personalities as God’s mission to His people for unity. Are we equipping ourselves as believers to seek unity in the body of Christ? The mission of unity is so strong throughout Scripture, for me, it is difficult to believe that personalities are pushed to the side and not incorporated. Which leads me to think that personalities and spirituality are fairly important when it comes to the body of Christ.”

Discussion: How do you see personality profiles as playing a role in individual relationships and in ministry?

5 Ways to Strengthen Your Prayer Life

A Common Concern

A common spiritual concern I hear goes something like,

“How do I get better at praying?”

Sure, it’s worded slightly different from person to person. It also sometimes comes in the form of a statement such as,

“I’m just not very good at praying.”

My response varies in detail and length depending on time constraints the person’s receptivity. As a whole, though, addressing this concern usually contains all or part of 5 recommendations.

5 Ways to Strengthen Your Prayer Life

These 5 recommendations, simply come from my own experience with answering the question for myself.

1. Pray Scripture

Though there are lots more, look at Ephesians 1:15-23, 3:14-19 & 4:14-19 as well as Colossians 1:9-14 for content to include in your own prayers. I actually have these marked in my Bible for this purpose. Be on the look out for other Scripture that you can use for your own prayers, whether the structure, content or both.

2. Read Scripture

Christians need a steady diet of God’s Word. A daily habit. This is sort of like eating regular meals and having a regular sleep schedule for maintaining a baseline of physical health. Reading the Bible daily maintains a baseline of spiritual health on which you can grow. Reading Scripture keeps you in tune with God’s heart and mind, like a healthy diet maintains physical homeostasis.

3. Study Scripture

This point gets at having a broader approach to studying the Bible as a whole. It involves regular, systematic Bible study. This can be doing a Bible study someone else wrote, or it can simply mean studying a book of the Bible in a structured way. Studying Scripture is in addition to daily reading of Scripture, though they can be combined. Systematic Bible study is how you grow spiritually.

Think of the health of your various relationships. How close you are to another person and how much a particular relationship deepens depends on the amount of quality time you spend together. Your relationship with God is no different. If you want your discussions with him (your prayer life) to grow and become stronger, then you have to consistently spend time with him.

4. Study Prayer

This gets at the idea of doing an intense look at the topic of prayer in the Bible. Studying prayer means looking up all the stories/verses that specifically mention prayer in some way to gain an understanding of the big picture regarding prayer. You can do this with any topic in the Bible, and it will help you tune into God’s heart and mind on that particular topic.

You can even do this on a smaller scale if you want. Take what is known as The Lord’s Prayer for example. Understanding that Jesus provided this as an example of how to pattern our prayers can really help transform your prayer life. See what I mean by checking out The Lords Prayer — An Outline for All of Our Prayers.

5. Be Led

Ask the Holy Spirit to lead you in progressing in your prayer life. Then, allow yourself to be led. In other words, be obedient to his leading. Don’t resist. This means making a habit of listening. So often, we pray to God but fail to listen for his response.

God responds in so many ways, from promptings through the Holy Spirit and insight gained as we read and study the Bible. God sometimes works through other people too, so be open to hearing from others through what other people say and do. Get in the habit of listening FOR God’s response at least as much as God listens to what you have to say.

Tools are Secondary

There are a lot of books and other tools (web sites, apps, etc.) about prayer available too. But, they are secondary to Scripture. If you’re not doing the above, then any tool you use or book you read will have minimal impact on your spiritual growth.

However, if you’re regularly reading and studying God’s Word, then additional tools can supplement those habits. For example, I regularly use a prayer journal or list to help me stay focused in my daily prayers. What I write in/on these often flows out of what I read in the Bible and how that connects with what’s going on in my life.

There are certainly a lot of good books on prayer as well as many terrific articles on the Internet. They can certainly help us see prayer from different perspectives and applications. However, avoid letting what others say about anything in the Bible be your first and primary source of what God has to say. In other words, make sure God’s Word — the Bible — is your primary source of what God has to say.

Progress Over Perfection

As with anything spiritual, remember that the goal is progress over perfection. So, keep taking steps of progress. Along the way, rejoice in how God is faithfully maturing you. Then give him the glory for what he’s doing in your life.

Fess Up When You Mess Up

The Value of Failure

No one likes to admit they made a mistake. Sure, some people are better and quicker at admitting mistakes than others, but I don’t think anyone can say they actually enjoy having to fess up when they mess up.

Failure has value when we admit our mistakes. As I have told my boys many times after a failure…

“Learn from it and move on.”

Our fessing up to mistakes also has tremendous value for others too. My mom was right when she implored me as I entered my teen years to learn from her mistakes. Today, I realize that the best mistakes to learn from are other people’s mistakes. Unfortunately, it took me 20 years to realize how very right my mother was. I wonder how much pain I could have avoided had I understood this sooner, had I been teachable earlier in life.

The Greatest Teacher

So, I now try to be more transparent about my own mistakes in an effort to help others at least not make the same ones. Maybe they’ll even make less mistakes altogether.
Yoda, as always, was right when he said…

“Pass on what you have learned. Strength, mastery. But weakness, folly, failure also. Yes, failure most of all. The greatest teacher failure is.” (The Last Jedi)

Yes, I have some expertise and experience I can use to teach others. My mistakes, however, will often be better teachers though.

For all of us, our greatest teacher is often our own failure. The failures of others can teach us too, though, if we let it. When we do, we get to receive the lesson without the baggage that comes along with making the mistake ourselves.

For Further Study

Consider the many examples of failure and folly in the Bible… Moses, David, Peter, etc. How can they can be examples for learning in your own life? Also note how these same individuals give us examples we can learn from through strength and mastery too.