My discouragement with running really epitomizes my battle with discouragement in general. Sure, I’ve experienced periods of relative success. Overall, though, running exists as simply a lifelong struggle.
One might ask, “Why keep doing it?” I guess because it helps me stare discouragement in the face and tell it, “I refuse to quit. I refuse to let you stop me.” If I quit running altogether, that opens the door for me to give up in other areas. Writing. Relationships. Faith. In the midst of discouragement, I often don’t know what to do, but I definitely know what not to do… quit.
While my own discouragement leaves me lethargic and frustrated, my inner locus of control keeps me moving even in the absence of any perceptible progress. However, seeing those I love — my boys and my husband especially — in seasons of discouragement creates a whole new level of struggle and even gets me to believe the possibility of defeat. If I felt knee deep in miry clay before, I feel like I’m laying down in it now and letting the mud seep into my orifices when one of them is struggling.
When the ones who usually encourage you lack their own courage, when the ones who you usually encourage can’t or don’t receive it, and when all of this happens simultaneously, life just feels frozen. Yet we continue about our days, continue on the treadmill of life, waiting for that moment when we see the upward path again and can jump off into progress.
If I’m not careful, debilitating loneliness creeps in when I’m discouraged. If that isn’t held in check, depression usually comes next. I’ve experienced this process far too many times in my life, and I’m determined to not experience it again. Ever. I don’t want my family to live in discouragement one moment longer than necessary either because I know all to well what comes if it lingers.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)
Perhaps this battle with discouragement exists as an all-too-familiar place for you too. Perhaps you want to declare defeat and quit running, especially when the end seems hidden somewhere in the unknown depths of the mud.
While I don’t know when this season will end for any of us, I do know where to go for encouragement within the struggle.
- Studying Scripture
- Pursuing the Holy Spirit
- Spending time in fellowship
- Allowing ourselves to be encouraged
In our pursuit of encouragement, we must realize that truth often comes long before we believe what it’s saying — before the feelings take hold. Knowing this, I see discouragement as a struggle awaiting victory, and I believe encouragement happens in the midst of — not after — discouragement. What I also know is that the path to being encouraged, to becoming unstuck, lies right on top of the path of discouragement. In other words, struggling through discouragement is the only way I’ll find true and lasting encouragement. With that, giving up simply isn’t an option.